Tuesday, August 24

Doing the Dew

Okay, I may be a raging freak, but I enjoy receiving my Dewsletter. (Yeah, that's right, I get a newsletter from Mountain Dew. It's not just a tasty beverage, it's a way of life.) This week, however, was a different story. They wrote to announce the arrival of Baja Blast Mountain Dew. (It's Mountain Dew blasted with tropical lime!) That's it, people. I've had it. There is Mountain Dew and there is (if you must) Diet Mountain Dew. There are no others. Period. Code Red? Unacceptable. LiveWire? Unthinkable. Baja Blast? Oh, god, please just make it end.

I need a drink. Or this shirt. Yes. This shirt would definitely ease my pain. And so would this one.

Update: Oh, the horror. Iszi has brought to my attention Pitch Black, yet another wrong wreaked upon mankind by the makers of Mountain Dew. Just in time for Halloween, you can now enjoy your Dew with a "burst of black grape flavor." I can't go on.

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