What's black and white and read all over? That's right: It's The Assimilated Negro, people. It's another day, another blog here at being jennifer garrett, but this time I'm warning you: Read at your own risk. This is some seriously funny shit. (Also, watch out: He's got 14 inches, and he's not afraid to use it.)
For instance, what would you do if Angelina Jolie kidnapped your mother and demanded sex as ransom? Well, clearly you'd have to fuck her, but only so you could say to your girlfriend later, "Listen!! I had to fuck Angelina Jolie!! It was the only goddamned way to get my mother back goddammit!!! If you can't respect that, you're just being selfish!!" Also, be wary: Apparently, sometimes men wonder what other men are thinking. (I think they're still thinking about fucking Angelina Jolie. Hell, I'm still thinking about fucking Angelina Jolie.)
Update: He just had to go and write all smart and interesting and shit, so I have to add this: "The awareness of our imperfection is that which both frees and shackles us." Okay, that's all.
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