Tuesday, October 5
That was a fan-fucking-tastic football game, and yes, I am totally saying that because the Patriots won it, 41-14. It's also a significant moment in my life, because tonight is the night I say goodbye to fantasy football. Sure, it's only four games into the season, but I've lost every week. And this week? This week I lost by .5 points. That's right: 0.5 fucking points. And when I realized that (moments after an awesometastic beatdown by my boys), I was pissed. Why couldn't Tommy have thrown for 10 more yards? Welker caught two more passes? Well, no more. That's bullshit. I'm sure fantasy must be fun for some crazy bitches out there, but not for me. I'm not letting some made-up team ruin the joy of an ass-kicking in Miami -- because, let's face it, they don't come along that often. Plus, I totally need to savor this for two whole weeks -- perhaps three, as after next week's bye, they face the f-ing Ravens. Ugh.